I am working a new process here today. My husband is moving out of the house. It's been a few years coming and I woke up this morning and said, it's here. It's really here. I am at a crossroads and can do one of two things: I can sulk and live in fear or I can rock this. I am going to take the other path and build myself up to my highest vibration. It's been a long run, a long cycle, but we are both going into this new phase with the understanding that we will still be in a relationship (hopefully happy and healthy) where we can co-parent our child. As I sit here at my desk, I realize that I am letting go of an old story and getting ready to build a new one. It's exciting, it's scary, but most of all it's just that, a blank slate. I get to put the words on there that I want. I get to decide my experiences, feel those feelings and make my own decisions. It feels a wee bit overwhelming right now to me, so I am going to take a moment to focus on self-care and love for myself and our child.
I can't tell you how appreciative of my husband I am (I need to come up with a term for this new reality but am stumped at the moment). He has given me my child, financial stability for years and just always has been there. Why then, do you ask? We also have been caught in a gerbil wheel of enabling each other to not be our best selves. It was when I finally became uncomfortable in my dysfunction that I discussed with him our need to go our separate ways. For once, he agreed with me.
As I navigate my new normal, I am going to keep going back to my "roots". My spiritual practices each morning, my work-outs, and my having fun. It can get easy to get caught up in what others think you should do: drama, blaming, etc. However, in this one, we are 50/50. We both have verbalized that we wish no drama. In fact, I'm not sure folks will even know what is going on because it has been that low key. I love this. I love this new way of thinking and not conforming to what society deems a separating couple's way to act. How cool is this?
I'm looking forward to my new future. It will have it's ups and downs, but the tools I am acquiring are giving me strength like I have never had before. I spent a good part of today wallowing in a feeling that I don't think I have felt before. Was it sadness, grief, fear, or something else? I'm just not sure. I reached out to someone today and they said to keep moving. Stay active and keep moving so those old thoughts and patterns keep moving out of my body.
Again, I look forward to my new future, new adventures and this life that I am now living! For each day, I am grateful.
"The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless your forgive the situation, unless you realize the situation is over, you cannot move forward." - Steve Maraboli
Until My Next Adventure,
Are you ready to say yes to your soul by shifting your perspective to create something extraordinary? I invite you to contact me via email at email@example.com to discuss how I can help you to make your next chapter better than your last.
Please also follow me on my Facebook Page: Trish Walker or via Twitter (Trish Walker@50foraYear).